101 Foster Care Tips: Building Trust
Welcome to the 2nd instalment of our weekly series where we explore some of the biggest issues facing anyone who is new to the fostering world, with useful hints and tips from ourselves, as well as our highly supportive fostering community.
After you prepare to foster, the next thing that many foster carers think about is how well their relationship will go with their foster child. More specifically, will my foster child be willing to trust me and my family?
Here at Perpetual Fostering we’ll always make sure that we find the perfect fit between foster carer and child, in addition to providing all the support and training you’ll ever need.
When looking to build up trust in your foster placement, it’s important to remember that each child is different in terms of their background, experiences and personality. So by approaching your foster placement with an open and welcoming mindset is certainly one way you can help to promote trust.
Our experienced Fostering Services Manager, Joanne, suggests that all foster carers ‘shouldn’t expect too much from yourself, your child or young person, or from your own family. Trust takes time to build and with time comes the reward!’
What our fostering community say about building trust in foster care
“They will not communicate with you if they don’t trust you. So you’ve got to give it time and just be there to listen day and night when they do want to talk.” – Cathryn
“They need to see you are prepared to put yourself out for them. They might not be thankful at first – they may not be very good at expressing their gratitude – but that changes over time.” – Elaine G
“Be there to help sort out any problems they might have. If their eyes are hurting when they play computer games, they may need a trip to the opticians. If you can solve these problems, they will be more willing to come to you for help and advice.” – Alison
“It helps if they like spending time with you. We knew our boy was a fan of tractors, buses and other types of vehicles so we spent time going on train rides with him and go around bus stations. We would also take of photographs of vehicles, such as ambulances, and turn the pictures into a slideshow, providing him with happy memories which he shared with us.” – Elaine P
As a foster parent, you have to understand that children and young people are entering an environment that is largely unfamiliar to them, regardless of how warm and welcoming you may try and make it. Whilst trust is one of the biggest headaches facing any foster relationship, it can often be one of the most straightforward issues to overcome.
The build up of trust takes time, but through the love, care and attention that you provide to your foster child, there’s little doubt that a special relationship can begin to blossom.
If you need more help and advice about building up trust in a foster placement, or you would like to speak to an expert about applying to become a foster carer, contact our head office on 0845 074 0076 today.